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Cheers to a new year!

Yesterday family plus extended family when to a sport club to enjoy new years. Turns out it was a bunch of older people having drinks and dancing to music from a long time ago. I especially liked "smooth operator" but I didn't dance.

The food was overpriced, not really good. Asian salad and Peking duck pancakes were too sweet and minuscule!. Like just two small roll ups and a sauce bowl of salad. That was just silly. I liked the smoked salmon salad though. I've never had smoked salmon. The main dished were my source of disappointment though. The meat was way too hard. I mean, I expected tender from watching tv shows and I could barely saw through with my knife. After I did though, when I popped it in my mouth it was like chewing a rubber toy? Way too hard. At this point I was wondering whether this was just European cuisine. The chocolate dessert was way better than the mango one as well. Like the chocolate one had a mini macaroon and tasted like coffee. The mango one was just cheesy with mango and coconut. Pretty uneventful.

The biscuits were nice too.

That NYE party was pretty awkward at first. I mean, it was just us Asians amongst a large crowd of old white people. We were seated unexpectedly with a couple who left early. It was just awkward. So strange. Since our family s used to mingling with other Asians, and we were really just there for the food.

We stayed for the fireworks on the tv however, and it was a sight to see everyone jump up to kiss and hug each other when the clock hit. They looked like they were having so much fun.

After that we went home and the car buzzed with conversation. Mine consisted of the quality of food with my cousin.

And at 1:30 I arrived home and tried to clear away my head by reading manga. Thought I'd start off the year with 'Bitter virgin',

Okay so before going to that party, I read Watashitachi no shiawase na Jikan. And oh my god it was amazing. I really, really almost cried. It was heartbreaking, and I just felt so connected to it. It's short and is definitely worth a read. I want to talk more about it but I don't want to spoil.

Bitter virgin was not as good, but it was great. Not phenomenal, and maybe because I've spent the last few days reading sad and messed up mangas, but this still hurt. The ending where
*Spoilers*

They both think they wont stay with each other forever

it's just

well, they just don't have enough faith in themselves, and that they can only cling to their time together while 'knowing' they they both aren't good enough.

After all of the events, can't you just be happy with each other?!

It sort of reminds me of the Jdorama Last friends.

Today is the first day of the year. I'm liking it so far, I woke up so late and I'm listening to some old songs that I have loved for a long time.

LM.C's 88 is what's playing on repeat right now. Somehow I feel hopeful when I listen to it because of the melody.

I'm also afraid that next year will be my year for HSC. It scares me, and the pressure from family is growing. I think everyday that I should start studying but I don't. I just can't sit down long enough to work. But it makes me so afraid that I can't catch up. And as the holidays come to a close, I get more panicked.